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Saddam Hussein Hanged

Too much to link to, but here’s a springboard on CNN.

How To Contact Amazon.com Customer Service

I’ve had it, I lost it, I found it again. You may need it and since Amazon doesn’t make a big deal about it since they’re so very awesome, I am providing (for them) this information: Amazon Customer Service Number: (800) 201-7575 (HT: Common Grounds). Encourage others to do the same. Happy New Year.

US Customer Service
Phone toll-free in the US and Canada: (800) 201-7575
Phone from outside the US and Canada: (206) 346-2992 or (206)-266-2992
Another direct line: (206) 266-2335
E-mail: orders@amazon.com
resolution@amazon.com
charge-inquiries@amazon.com

Amazon’s rebate center: 1-866-348-2492
Amazon Corporate Accounts:1-866-486-2360

Snail mail to customer service
Amazon.com, Inc.
Customer Service
PO Box 81226
Seattle, WA 98108-1226

Service for Amazon Sellers
877-251-0696
They also have special e-mail accounts for spoofing and abuse:
stop-spoofing@amazon.com
reports@amazon.com
Canadian Customer Service
Phone 9 a.m. to 10 p.m. Eastern time, 6 a.m. to 7 p.m. Pacific: (877)-586-3230

Corporate Offices, Seattle
(206) 622-2335

Which Universe would win?

I’m putting up a few universes against each other. Star Trek, Star Wars, Stargate or Galactica: who do you think would win and can you state why? I know I could list other universes but I won’t.

Who Are They Charlie Brown?

Nailing down the characters on the stage in A Charlie Brown Christmas is an act at ADHD in practice. Without further ado here is an identification of these unsual suspects.
Firstly, lets’ begin by listing the characters that were in the special but not on stage.

00_charlie.jpg
Charlie Brown. The namesake of the cartoon who at this point was either about to be introduced as the play’s new director or was being ignored after a speech on how he expects things to be run or was fuming as the play continued applauding commercialism while ignoring the true meaning of Christmas.

02_lucy.jpg
Lucy. Who was at this point either about to introduce Charlie Brown as director or was ignoring him with forgotten scripts in hand or snapping her fingers to the tune. She loves Schroeder, is Linus’ sister and takes all of Charlies Brown money and mental health. She has five good reasons why people should listen to her: they usually are summed up by her fist.

03_patty.jpg
Patty. Her disappearance on stage is inexplicable especially since she is obviously part of the group gathering for the play. Perhaps she was controlling the lights that would later focus on Linus as he explains the true meaning of Christmas. She’s also abusive to Charlie Brown and I’m happy that she eventually is never seen on stage again and another Patty becomes famous.

We’ve gotten this far with no complaints. Now, unto the characters on stage and in numerical order.

01_pigpen.jpg
01. Pigpen.
His cloud of dust is distinctive. Charlie Brown would point out that it was perhaps the dust of previous civilizations that gave the young man a distinguished air especially in light of playing the Innkeeper.

02_schroeder.jpg
02. Schroeder.
An expert on the toy piano, he leads the group in that unforgettable song which consists of a Piano, a Percussionist (doing maracas or the drums) and a bass—though no guitar. This begets a question: what exactly is Snoopy doing?

03_freida.jpg
03. Freida. Assigned the role of Innkeeper’s wife and boasts about her naturally curly hair.

04_3or4.jpg
04. Either 3 or 4. I’ll explain later.

05_violet.jpg
05. Violet. She’s the one who didn’t give Charlie Brown a Christmas Card—so nasty. She’s fairly abusive and calls him stupid and stuff like that which is unfortunate since I don’t like my son hearing stuff like that so that he doesn’t emulate it too early.

06_shermy.jpg
06. Shermy. Yeah, he’s doing something like the Frankenstein. I think people don’t expect much from poor ol’ Shermy since every year he is assigned the part of a shepherd.

07_linus.jpg
07. Linus. He’s a genius with a security blanket that he takes with him everywhere. The only time he let it go was when he quoted the Nativity story and when he was swaddling the small branch of a tree.

08_sally.jpg
08. Sally. She’s Charlie Brown’s sister and she is in love with Linus. She

09_snoopy.jpg
09. Snoopy. This dog is The Man. He plays guitar, he dances, he flies a doghouse and hunts the Red Baron!

10_5.jpg
10. 5. He is the brother of 3 and 4 (they’re twins). The information is never divulged in the episode as well as his sisters names but we find out from the comic strip that his father hated how everyone was being labeled with a number in society so he named his kids after numbers not as a protest but as a sign of giving up. I might as well link to it before MCF does.

11_4or3.jpg
11. 4 (or 3). The twin sister of 3 (or 4).

Links N’ Junk 18

BHT Meme

I’m crossposting this at the Bible Archive. It’s a sort of Christianese meme by the Boar’s Head Tavern so most readers can feel free to ignore this post, respond to it (funny or not) with one sentence answers—doesn’t matter.

  • Baptism: Done upon profession of faith and it doesn’t do anything for your salvation.
  • The Lord’s Supper: Only symbols done in remembrance (as often as possible) with no real presence of Christ in them or by them.
  • Emerging Church: Go for it, folk and hopefully some entrenched thinking gets uprooted.
  • Young Earth Creationism: I don’t know—there’s an ambiguity in the text and in empirical data that points to No but who knows what an omnipotent God can or can not do.
  • Cessationism: I don’t know, there’s an ambiguity that leads me to think Yes but once again, if God decides to start it up again I doubt he’d ask me.
  • Abraham Lincoln: Is “duck!” in bad taste?
  • Gender Issues: Although they are equal they do each have certain roles and both men and women should be treated with respect.
  • Inspiration of the Bible: Yes, in the original text.
  • Gay Marriage: I really don’t know because I think it’s wrong for them not to get those tax breaks and what not that other folk get and because Society kind of already destroyed the definition of marriage but yet as a Christian I also have to take a stand against that, lying, theft, murder, etc—definitely in the Church no.
  • Education (Home, Public, Private, None): I am in favor of it. Heh.
  • Who is TR on the BHT? I don’t have a clue since I don’t really read their names.
  • Sanctification: Upon justification, positionally sanctified but going through life we must practically sanctify ourselves.
  • BHT Comments: Keep them closed but someone has to answer emails when I write in!

Can You Name Them All?

Note, Charlie Brown is NOT in this picture:

charlie.jpg

Recent Design: 01

From our November Denver issue:

Opening Spread

Second Page

Closing Page

Humor Scale

the Cutting Edge
(52% dark, 42% spontaneous, 21% vulgar)

your humor style:
CLEAN | SPONTANEOUS | DARK

Your humor’s mostly innocent and off-the-cuff, but somehow there’s something slightly menacing about you. Part of your humor is making people a little uncomfortable, even if the things you say aren’t themselves confrontational. You probably have a very dry delivery, or are seriously over-the-top.

Your type is the most likely to appreciate a good insult and/or broken bone and/or very very fat person dancing.

PEOPLE LIKE YOU: David Letterman - John Belushi

graph

The 3-Variable Funny Test!

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

free online dating free online dating
You scored higher than 48% on darkness
free online dating free online dating
You scored higher than 38% on spontaneity
free online dating free online dating
You scored higher than 11% on vulgarity

Links N’ Junk 17

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