Winter Driving For Dummies (And You)

It has snowed maybe two times and I’ve already seen some of the most idiotic driving. Coming from New York City, I’m used to a fair amount of snow and stupid driving, but what I’ve been encountering has happened in maybe an inch of snow. So, this post is an open letter of do’s and don’ts during winter driving.

Now mind you, I’m not a great driver, so nothing in this post should be taken as that. In fact, I drive a Toyota Sienna, which puts me on the side of fairly conservative drivers. My history of car driving has consisted of a Camry, an Accord, a Jeep Cherokee, a converted Ford van (which I damaged), and a 1971 Mercedes Benz I lovingly called “Ugly”.  But I am a driver that is often scared by the stupidity of other drivers, so I take precautions that I’m pretty sure other folk don’t take.

So if you drive in the snow, read this as a refresher. Maybe you’re not one of the idiots I’m referring to, that’s okay. But you don’t have to admit it if you are:

Continue reading

Profiling Isn’t Racist…is It?

I’m a New Yorker. Not an Upstate New Yorker: I was born and bred in Queens, spent most of my time in Brooklyn, and enjoyed hanging out in Manhattan. I remember 42nd Street when it was a whole mess seedier and you’d get off the train holding your camera close to your body and under your coat. I remember coming back from trips out of state and smiling whenever I saw the Twin Towers on the horizon. I actually enjoy Dirty Water Dogs…they’re a guilty pleasure. I’m totally proud of our Pizza, even after having had a slice in Chicago.

I’m also Hispanic. Not the white looking Ricky Martin type. I’m one of the dark ones that don’t look Hispanic at all. My expression, on a regular day, has the somber visage of a person who isn’t happy—even if I’m completely content. It’s not that I have a cloud over my head; it’s just that I’m one of those ugly people.

Continue reading

US Gov’t Proposes Life Tax

UNITED STATES: President Obama announced today that, out of all his priorities, “the formulation of a Life-Tax is a number one priority”.

On the heel of several legislations (Health Care Reform Bill, Financial Reform Bill, Student Education Reform Bill, The Reform Reform Bill and the Reform to Reform Act of 2010) the United States Congress and Senate have realized the dire need to pay for it all.

“To bottom line it—” said Chairmen of the Federal Reserve Paul Volcke “We don’t have a clue how to pay for it, and we sure as heck don’t want to mess with interest rates. So we figure more regulations is the way to go.”

The Life-Tax (link to the Government Bullet Point Agenda site), strangely called the Thenardier Tax by the uneducated Tea Party masses, will be most heavily levied against salt, sugar, caffeine, plastic, and  porn.

“Look man, Americans use this stuff—especially the fat rich Americans—so we have to ask: should we tax them to help their fellow American? Yes. We. Can.” responded Pop Star Will-I-Am. When questioned about the portions of the proposed agenda like “the Breathing Assessment” and “Listening Levy” which would directly impact music making and sales, he passed the microphone over to Wycleff Jean who said something incisive and poignant which we will report on once we can transcribe it.

Vice President Joe Biden “Look, this is a big F****** deal (laughs). Freedom isn’t free and it’s about time American Joe-Q Public realized it.”

When notified about the Vice President’s statement, the Administration said “Frankly, if you compare our track record with the previous administration of  Bush-Cheney-Palin, you would easily see that whatever the Vice President said wouldn’t have been said if they had done what they did when they should have done it.”

RELATED STORY LINKS:

  • The President and First Lady on American Idol Gives Back Air–AI’s First Silent Show.