I can’t remember my first day of school. Maybe it’s because I only spoke Spanish when I was younger or maybe it’s because I tend to forget things. It’s probably why I enjoy studying so much: forgetfulness makes everything new.
My son has been looking forward to kindergarten. He’s been reading since he was three and currently enjoys spending time in science text books reading about everything from the circulatory to the solar system. The other night over dinner he tells me “I can’t wait to learn about the Digestive System and the Central Nervous System in school. I can’t wait until we do Experiments!”
Not wanting to make his first memory of kindergarten to be “there are no experiments until fifth grade!” I just smiled.
“I love school. It’s fun. We paint, we sing, we play.”
“Yeah?”
“But I hate recess.”
“Why’s that??”
“The kids hit me. They threw me to the floor. They hit me on the head and they kept flicking my eyes. Then they stopped me from going on the slides and they followed me everywhere.”
“…”
“One of them called me a thief.”
“Did you take something?”
“No, I was on the jumpy bridge and a big fat kid yelled in my face saying ‘NO! You Little Thief!’”
“Did the teacher see any of this?”
“The teacher wasn’t there: it was two big people. But they were talking.”
“Oh.” He then proceeded to explain to me how a bunch of kids went around and threw kids on the ground but how they kept throwing him down and hitting him on the head and pulling his hair and flicking his eyeballs.
Tonight, around 11:30, my son’s first memory of kindergarten recess-time woke him up crying.
11 responses to “His First Day of School”
That’s sad and spooky. On my first day, I just had two kids kicking me, knocking over my blocks every time I built stuff, cornering me, and eventually just throwing blocks at me. You don’t remember it, but I’d be your first day of school was also similar. I guess in the long run, no matter where you live, human nature will always see the physically stronger knocking down the nicer and/or intellectually stronger kids. And somehow they always find those openings where adults aren’t paying attention.
In the long run, you know he’s going to go a lot further in life than those little eyeball-flickers, but it’s still upsetting to read about the little guy going through similar trials. The upside is that it does get better. The downside is that it can take years.
Oh, but if you’d like, I can take a ride out there and kick their asses, and you can tell the cops you don’t know who I am. I know that scenario actually would end with a fat 32 year old lying in the sand crying while kindergardeners flick his eyeballs, but I still thought I’d offer. :)
The best is to explain to Sy the good (and the bad) of kindergarten. As a teacher, I know during lunch time that adult(s) aren’t paying much attention; as Sy’s Titi, I commend on how he handled it, but he should know for next time, TELL THE TEACHER. As a ‘former’ Reynoso, those 2 ‘big people’ need to be dragged out ito the middle of the playground and beat down. You’re not paying to have your kid picked on in private school. A friend of mine uses the Strike 3 Rule with her son: 1st time, tell the teacher; 2nd time, tell the teacher that this is the 2nd time you’re letting her know, and if it’s not taken care of, you’re going to do something about it yourself; 3rd time, expect me to go ‘buckwild’ on the punks!(And be prepared as a parent to question why nothing was done on the authoritative level). The 2 times she had to go to school (once in kindergarten, once in the 5th grade) to speak about her son, she had his back all the way, because she knew if it came down to him fighting to defend/protect himself, it’s because the teacher didn’t take care of it, and so was the teacher at fault each time! (I’ve never seen a parent win this type of argument against a teacher ‘for’ her son fighting, but she did!)
I’m rooting for my lil nephew, he’s be OK!
Hmmm, my first day, some little Sicilian kid kept putting himself in front of my feet and I clumsily knocked in his desk a few times making his block building fall down. Overall, a good day.
the greek: lol
titi: i think i am gonna follow the strike three policy but not to allow the Boy to unleash the darkside.
mcf: I’ll have to check with my parents but I think most of my tears resulted from not understanding anything “no entiendo! no entiendo!” Anyway, the image of 32-year-old-you being surrounded by a gang of five year olds is pretty funny.
I’d missed this post before. Now I’ve read it and I’m seriously pissed off. What is up with those kids? I remember that kids could be mean when I was little, but that’s really extreme. Rey, you and your boy will be in my prayers … but right now I’m just seething.
Thanks Darrell.
Rey,
Been out of pocket for a while and just noticed this a few days ago. It’s been on my mind but I haven’t really known what to say that would actually be useful. The whole thing just makes me seethe. So, I’m just going to ramble a minute and maybe something decent will come out. Monkeys typing and all that…
We have a 2nd and a 1st grader(both girls) in public school so the Kindergarten experience is not far behind us. Plus we have another one(boy) coming up in a few years. I have to say that had this happened to one of my girls(and I know boys are somehow different) I would likely have stormed off and regretted it later. Even so, this kind of bullying and picking on deserves a response at some level as it’s not conducive to what school should be about.
At the girls school, they have a whole campaign for a “Bully Free Zone”. The guidance counselor talks to the kids about it and the rest of the staff is supposed to be behind it as well. It’s not perfect but it does provide a “safe” place for the kids to report this kind of behavior. There’s always the chance of tattling or over-reacting but that’s true regardless.
I’m gonna assume that noone at your son’s school is going to say the scenario he faced is in anyone’s best interest. In the same situation, I think I would go to someone I felt comfortable with(teacher, principal, guidance counselor) and ask them how the situation should be handled. This comes across as less threatening that telling them how to handle things and it shows you recognize their expertise and are willing to work with them. Especially since this is a private school, I would hope they’d be willing to listen and offer some kind of solution. I can’t imagine they haven’t dealt with this kind of thing before.
And if that doesn’t work, bring out the bats. :)
Jenn(my wife) is really the expert on these kinds of things so maybe she’ll chime in at some point.
I’ll be praying for you and Sy.
Hey, if you feel like it, post an update and let us know how Sy is doing. I keep checking, hoping for one. I’ve been a little worried about him. I’m glad, though, that he’s got a good family while he’s making this adjustment.
[…] my son went back to school with much trepidation but armed with unknown resources: we notified his teacher about what had […]
Darrell: Sorry about that; the new one has me all out of sorts. I had a ton I wanted to post but I couldn’t get to it ’till today though I did just put up a new post.
Brian: believe you me, with my hot hispanic blood and my flesh warring within me, i was very much on the verge of storming off. the only reason i didn’t is because my brother was in the same spot years ago but his reaction put him under the wrong kind of scrutiny by the teachers forever marked out as a Problem Kid with Problem Parents. Teachers rightly think they’ve seen it all but sometimes I think that makes them jump to some unwarranted conclusions.