Rey's A Point

When Is A Pikachu Not A Pokémon?

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My son started speaking at one and in his Borg-like ability to acquire language skills I found myself constantly surprised by what words he knew. I was constantly on the defense, answering questions. But then the day that every father dreads dawned, when his very vocal boy looks up at him, points between his legs and asks “what is this called?”

When he asked that some four years ago my overactive imagination conjured various scenarios where a public pronouncement of private (ahem) information could prove socially disastrous. I didn’t want to be one of those embarrassed parents burying my head in my napkin after my boy shouts that his “PeePee needs to go WeeWee” in a crowded restaurant. I also didn’t want to be one of those parents apologizing to everyone when their kid scientifically explains how his Penis works (if you’re one of those militant types, sorry, I just don’t agree). Seeing the very real possibility I opted to label it something else…something innocuous that has no chance of being socially damaging: Pikachu.

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That’s right; the unofficial mascot of the 2002 animated series Pokémon became the name of my son’s penis. There’s no lost love here. He’s been calling It a Pikachu ever since and our strategy has saved us from countless embarrassing moments but a year or two ago I realized the disaster of that label.

Although this name was not popularly used for such (cough) members this name belonged to a cultural icon. So when the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade was on TV and Al Roker announced their biggest float yet; “the great and majestic Pikachu!”—my wife and I dove at the remote and shut off the TV while my son sat there puzzled.

This bit of vocab-update is on my To-Do List for this year.

Rey

7 responses to “When Is A Pikachu Not A Pokémon?”

  1. ROFL…I of course knew where this was going from the title of the post alone, but the Thanksgiving bit is hilarious. “A giant what is floating down Fifth avenue??”

    Only in NY. ;)

  3. Al Roker announced their biggest float yet; “the great and majestic Pikachu!”—my wife and I dove at the remote and shut off the TV while my son sat there puzzled.

    ROTFLOL. I can’t help but imagine your son growing up and wondering why on earth they had such an obscene float at the parade when he was a kid.

    My ex wife was assertive on this issue, she wanted our son to learn the word “penis.” I was indifferent, so I said OK. Problem was, he couldn’t say that word, the closest he could get was “pencil.” You might be able to imagine that we add all kinds of weird conversations in the presence of family members who didn’t know what the heck was going on.