I’m getting fat. After eating way too late and sitting down for an hour and a half of solid commentary reading, I wind up laying on the sofa looking at something. Sometimes Something is playing at the same time as Something Else so I wind up DVR’ing it adding to my increasing weight. Feeling the need to be productive I start writing this review of summer shows with a caveat: there will be spoilers.

Angela’s Eyes (LIFETIME)
Angela (played by the adorable Abigail Spencer) plays a good character mired in a horrid script, muddled storytelling and downright clunky exposition. Honestly, the first five minutes of the show Angela, in dialogue with a co-worker, describes herself (yes, herself) as “Inquisitive and smart.” Hello, we didn’t need to be told that—ugh. I wish her story wasn’t on Lifetime instead housed in USA’s warm characters welcome environment. Spencer has the role down pat though—her constant roving eyes examining any room she enters without hitting you over the head that she’s doing it. As the commercial describes, Angela is a master with case files but a horror with friends. I might see it again only because the lead character has potential. Oh yeah, I’m going to email Lifetime and tell them this.

Blade the Series (SPIKE)
Kirk Jones (AKA:Onyx’s Sticky Fingaz) co-stars as the shows namesake, Blade (SpikeTV). He shows up for wanton violence, cool shooting and brusque one-liners. Like the movie, the Blade character is just there for cool factor. Jill Wagner, for all appearances sake (ahem), is on the show for the male eye. But, she is core to the show. Struggling with her past and with being a vampire she works with Blade on trying to fight the undead who killed her brother (and her). What I like about the show is how they’ve taken things from the movies (like vampires dying and turning into ash) and have put it into the real world (humans discover said ashes and start a drug trade). Krista (Wagner) is dead smack in the middle of this and constantly finds herself forced to make hard decisions: be it to protect her loyalties or help Blade’s cause.

Psych (USA)
James Roday and Dulé Hill play one of the coolest detective teams to ever grace television. Shawn (Roday) has a honed photographic memory and the training to be super observant while having the character flaw of being attracted to almost all women and being completely self-absorbed. Gus (Hill) on the other hand is the straight man with some obvious quirks (he calls his nose the Super Sniffer). These two stumble through mysteries arguing like the old buddies they portray while unabashedly lying to the police that Spencer is in fact a Psychic. So Psych (standing for Psychic or “Gotcha”) is this dynamic detective duo making some awesome moves on USA. I love everything about this show: the observations, the mysteries, the relationship with the hard father, the relationship with the boys, and even any outtakes at the end of the episode. It’s all around great.

Shalom in the Home (TLC)
Rabbi Shmuley Boteach takes his big metal mobile home, and visits families that are having serious issues with peace at home. He comes in with suggestions, tips and correction in the hope that the family will realign their thinking. The show is insightful, causes some serious self-reflection and is all about great.

Monk (USA)
This show is awesome; I don’t need to review it. Just wanted to share this episode’s highlights. Monk is completely going wacko due to a trashman strike happening in San Francisco. His observation skills are so off that he winds up doing his big Monk speech revealing the killer way too early in the episode and pinning it all on Chi McBride (the Mayor). Obviously wrong, and in the middle of a huge breakdown, Monk reveals the “true” killer fifteen minutes later: Alice Cooper. He does his speech on how Alice Cooper committed the murder where we have a cut scene to Alice sneering and proceeding to commit the murder in an over-the-top-yet-completely-awesome-performance. I actually cheered. What a great show.

Miscellany
I was blown away by the Stargate premieres; although I think that Atlantis is doing way better stuff than SG-1 and is fast on its way to becoming the better of the two. I’m also looking forward to Eureka and Who Wants To Be A Superhero (both on SciFi). Of course, I can’t wait for the return Battlestar (the best show on TV—Season 3 trailer to air during Eureka).